Constipation is a common complaint (and rarely serious) in the ER. Usually it is pretty easy to deal with – enemas, Mag Citrate, Miralax, etc. In fact, I will pretty much do ANYTHING to avoid the eventual conclusion. And by that I mean dis-impaction. Basically inserting your finger up there and pulling out wads of hard, impacted stool in the shape of cheap chicken nuggets. Easily the least favourite “procedure” I can think of. The other “option” is to turf the dirty work to a PA or resident – but I remember being that guy so I rarely do that. Of course, that does not mean I have even a remote interest in doing it!
The other day I desperately tried round after round of other stuff – and dang it all, the guy wouldn’t crap!
Guess I gotta roll up the sleeves, throw in the towel, and dig into that colon. Good thing I did it WELL after lunch.
wow I have never seen a Doc disimpact anyone, lucky Rn’s do
Who uses fingers when perfectly good fists and power drills exist?
Reasons I do this.
Hi Dr. ERP…Okay, off topic, but here goes. i am sooo ashamed to admit this, however, last friday night i was the horroble a@@hole of a patient that, well, just ruins you whole night. i got really drunk (not my usual behavior!), cut up my arm and OD’ed. To say i was rather difficult would be putting it lightly. i was INSANE!!! I gave everyone an awful time and i feel soooo bad about it now, especially because i admire physicans and nurses and all health care workers so much. My question is, do you think it would be approprite to take in an apology note and some token (i don’t know, candy…what do you like?), (ideas?) addressed to the staff on duty that night? Or, would that just make things that much worse?
Thanks,
tracy
Tracy, probably not a bad idea.
I think I would appreciate…try ro take in something that can last a few hours without wasting…ER people never know when they will be able to have a break.
Chocolate is the best apology for strangers in my experience.
Yeah, I was a drunk once, long ago. Managed to avoid ER trips, but messed up plenty otherwise.
Does disimpaction reimburse well?
Tracy,
What kind of Jerk were you? A screaming bitch? Better to move out of the community or just kill yourself because they will remember you. Have you heard of computerized charting. It never goes away. You should be ashamed of yourself. Do the ER a favor and send them dinner from a restaurant. Send a note along with it. Hopefully they will not think that your trying to poison them.
“he other “option” is to turf the dirty work to a PA or resident”
Get over yourself ERP. Take care of your own patients problems and don’t expect PAs to do your work for you. You picked up the chart, no deal with it. I sure the PAs are seeing their own patients and get their fair share of constipated patients. I don’t know anyone who would sign up to dis-impact your patients. If it means jamming your hand up someone’s ass, then pull your sleeves up and get to work. You should begin with an exam, and that means rectal with a lot of lubrication. That may be all the patient needed to begin with.
Tracy,
Your a loser.
TRACY,
GET HELP FOR YOUR DRINKING PROBLEMS. STOP BEING A LOSER. YOU SOUND LIKE A JERK.
Dude, I’m never, ever going to look at chicken nuggets the same way again.
I WISH I WERE DEAD ……NOW. AFTER POSTING THIS. WHAT A DUMBASS FOOL I WAS!!!!!
ERPA, if you are so enthusiastic about rectal exams, then I imagine you must rush to pick up those charts!
What’s worse is when the patient is so eager to
have this done…..
There’s a difference between being miserably
constipated and hoping for relief and being sooooo
happy (with a smile) that they’ve got to
undergo this procedure….ick.
ERP,
I heard that you prefer to do your rectal exams without using your hands. Porno style. Enjoy them the only way you know how.
ERPA !! I don’t see anything funny about your posts, it just shows your ignorance and believe me you weren’t being funny at all! well, mabey to yourself! and calling a person a loser only makes you look like the loser, normally I don’t react to someone’s post I disagree with on ERP’s Blog, so congratulations for being that first one! and Tracy if you really are sorry about your actions then not only buy them lunch but make a donation to a children’s fund, that would be something good that comes from your heart and would show that you really do care. ohh and ERP,, while I love your stories this one was really gross!!! LOL EWWWW
A stickler for grammar here.
ERPA you used the wrong spelling of “you’re” for the slur against Tracy.
You should have used “you’re” not “your.”
Well really you should have kept that thought to yourself.
Stacy,
Don’t try to defend Tracy, the town drunk. It makes you look bad. Trust me, people who act like this are losers. ERPA was right.
Thank you Stacy and Cardio girl…i got them a bunch of gift cards to a steak house and will include a note…i like the idea of a donation as well.
The Town Drunk, Loser
Good for you Tracy. Learn from your mistakes. I am proud of your decision to do something good.
Tracy,
You F up, and you’re making amends. Good for you. Live on and prosper.
Thanks cardiogirl for the grammar and spelling correction. Dyslexia at its finest.
I’m a nurse in the ER and I once had a patient that stuck his wife’s ginormous cylindrical bottle of perfume up his ass “to relieve his impaction”
Uh huh…..
That bought him a trip to the OR since it got sucked up too far into the black hole of doom. . .
I’m also guessing that wifey needed a new bottle of perfume.
Our job is awesome, right??
I went to my Dr. for a physical.
Dr: “Ok, we have to do a digital exam now. Drop your pants.”
Me: “Oh, they have computers for that now?”
Dr holding up KY and one gloved finger: “Um…no.”