What is worse than working a holiday weekend? Working the day AFTER a holiday weekend! The ER was a Sh** show today! (actually there were two patients where that was literally the case!). Here is a little taste of my 11 hour shift:

1. The PA was an hour late since there was a screw up with the schedule.

2. 4 people registered during my 10 minute sign out.

3. There was (is) a terribly annoying psych patient in the ER all day waiting for a transfer bed (she had already been there 50 hours). She kept demanding that I or the RN come in and evaluate her for supposedly newly occurring acute medical problems.

4. A 83 year old perfectly functional man dropped over with a massive thrombotic CVA (stroke) - he started vomiting and I had to intubate him - which of course was very difficult for some reason. He got TPA but was not improving when he went up to ICU

5. A 52 year old woman with massive constipation for 6 months. She was too “afraid” to give herself an enema. When our RN did, she then proceeded to defaecate for nearly an hour in the bedside commode and patient bathroom.

6. A 97 year old lady who lives alone was found covered with urine and faces by her niece this morning lying in the bathroom. Toilet paper all over the place. Luckily no injuries but she was developing rhabo (muscle breakdown) from lying on the tile floor all night. She was not fun to examine.

7. An 11 year old boy with a new onset seizure.

9. A 13 year old girl with a large complex haemorrhagic ovarian cyst

10. Two drunks -luckily both so out of it as to not be any trouble - except they smelled ripe.

11. The second doctor and PA were both late due to massive flooding -induced traffic.

13. A 60 year old man with foreign body (chicken bone) stuck in his posterior pharynx. After I could not get it out, I spent nearly an hour arranging for him to go over to the ENT doc’s office (no small feat since he had no insurance) and immediately be seen. Turns out, the ENT guy called me two hours later stating that the guy decided to cancel the appointment since he “was not feeling well” - he said he”might” be in tomorrow. Ungrateful $^$%#%#!

14. I had terrible back pain the whole shift and took a boatload of Motrin and Tylenol.

15. A 48 year old man with Brugada Syndrome whose defibrillator was going off!

16. A 30 year old woman who was basically delivering a fibroid and bleeding massively. She went to the OR quickly (but not quickly enough for my satisfaction!).

I felt like some poor schmo sentry at the Bastille on July 14th, 1789