Lets see, you’re a 43 year old woman and in my ER with recurrent facial abscesses. You have celulitis all over your cheek which is very puffy. Your teeth are rotted. You have snorted massive amounts of cocaine for more than 20 years and now your entire nasal septum is gone and the resulting cavernous […]

Patient (woman who has been in my ER dozens of times always for chronic tooth pain and nonexistent mandibular dislocations - ie acts like it is out and refuses to move jaw even though it appears clinically in place and x-rays always show normal anatomical location): “Finally! I have been waiting an hour!” […]

In a recent study which at its heart has noble intentions, researchers found that Morphine helps relieve the post-traumatic stress of returning gulf war veterans. The study was published in the New England Journal of Medicine. Personally, although I imagine relieving such stress is good, potentially creating a group of people who come […]

So, my hospital, as well an many others I suppose, have certain criteria as to whom they send their Press Ganey patient satisfaction scores to. The policy is (and should be) that they do not send them to patients who present with psychiatric symptoms and/or alcohol or substance abuse related complaints. It does not have […]

Some ER residents made his “patient faking a seizure” video that is hilarious. I love the “That is not a seizure, that is a dance move” and ” I am allergic to employment”.

Here is a repost of an old post - coming on the heels of the post I did on WhiteCoat’s blog that caused quite a “sensation”…..
A “Seeker” is a term used in ER language for a person coming in to the ED with one mission - to obtain narcotics. Usually they exaggerate a chronic medical […]

I had a pleasant conversation with a lovely patient the other night shift I worked. She is a frequenter of every ER in my county - well known to be addicted to herculean doses of Dilaudid and Fentanyl for a myriad of chronic pain conditions. It went something like this:
Patient: “I need pain […]