36 y/o female chief complaint at triage: “I forgot why I came. Gimme a minute and I’ll remember!”
Archive for the ‘Annoying’ Category
A). I walk in the room and you greet me with “Yo, what-da fuck up cuz!?”
B). You’re a drunken dope who cut his face and you keep telling me “Don’t fuck this shit up, I’m a model!” while I’m suturing you.
C). You say “Fuck this shit don’t work!” and you throw the Motrin offered to you on the floor.
D). You say “Oh my God, I’m gonna vomit!!” and then you stick your finger down your throat and then throw up.
If there’s one thing that irritates the heck out of me now is when people do poor quality CPR. The new ACLS recommendations are that they be done at 100 bpm and to compress the chest adequately. You’re not supposed to pause to check for a pulse every 15 seconds. You not supposed to push down like you’re giving the person a massage.
Now if the person is a billion years old with terminal cancer, I’m not quite so irritated. However the point is if you’re going do it, you should do it right.
I don’t feel like getting in the discussion of the unofficial “slow code” but for everyone else, PUMP HARD. You should be sweating after two minutes! It means you just might be saving that person.