Me: “Sir, you have a really nasty case of ballanitis – your penis is infected with yeast.”

Mr Candida:”Oh. Well does that mean I shouldn’t ask chicks to suck it?”

Oh the Irony! I bet that made an interesting medic call

There are doctors that act like they popped out of a Robert Lewis Stephenson novella. One day they my pop into the ER (even strangely enough late at night) and they are charming. They make jokes. They ask about your kids, how you feel, etc. They chit chat with the nurses and other staff. They are polite. They gladly do what they came there to do, no matter how unpleasant and time consuming it may be.

Then other days (and that means sometimes during the middle of day after they are presumably well rested) they transform into the despicable Mr Hyde, devoid of conscience. Now, they generally don’t murder people by beating them with a cane (like in then novel) but they growl. They scowl. They show their displeasure at being in the ER to all. They snap at you for calling them in. They give terse, one or two word answers. The slink away when they are finished and everyone prays that he or she doesn’t need to be called back in.

You could chalk this up to “having a bad day” which anyone can have – however, when it happens about 50% of the time, I would hesitate to call it that. One might suggest they aren’t having enough sex – and yes, that could be part of it. I think it’s just that they are emotionally liable, maybe even cyclothymic. They just wake up one day and are pissed off, and the other day they are cheery and manic-y. Either that or they are doing some bizarre experiments on themselves in the hospital basement.