Archive for the ‘Vomit’ Category
Normally, I prefer interesting, sick cases over the routine stuff. Not between the hours of 11pm and 4am though. Not when they come in all at once. Not when I am by myself on the overnight shift. I’ll take some regular ‘ole CHF any day over:
1. Sigmoid sinsus thrombosis in someone who randomly fell and hit their head.
2. Severe hypocalcaemia from an overenthusiastic thyroidectomy with carpoedal spasm, seizures, and strabismus.
3. A baby with intussusception
4. A young man with likely toxic shock syndrome from God-know’s where.
5. A woman with a big ball of half chewed spagetti and Italian bread lodged in her esophagus.
6. A guy with a recurrent head bleed that no one can figure out what the cause is – despite massive MRI and angiographical workups.
7. A guy with a giant thrombosed haemorrhoid – well, that one was cool. I incised it and got the mother of all clots out.
Me: “Sir, I notice you are here for testicular pain and swelling as well as a discharge from your penis”
26 year old normal appearing male: “Yeah, for the last week there’s pus and blood coming out in my semen when I ejaculate.”
Me: “I see. I presume you are sexually active? Have you had unprotected sex?”
Pt: “Yeah, three weeks ago – but then nothing til last night when I met a new girl”
Me: “You had unprotected sex with a woman knowing you were ejaculating pus and blood?!?!?”
Pt: “Yeah, I know that’s kinda bad, but at least I didn’t do it in her mouth.”
Me: “That’s still bad” (while staving off the urge to vomit)